Secondary Problem

i love having a free house

because i can scream and shout and no matter how loud i am, nobody hears me. the closer it gets to it, the more i am really looking forward to going to college. mainly because you get to meet and mix with so many people. and also because i have been assured that the childish elements of bitching and backstabbing will mature out of them. i love secondary school, i always have. but the fact you have to permanently be watching your back for people you think you can trust ready to stick the knife in, and twist. and that really grates on me. although, the prospect of only twenty more school days, and that it will all be over soon, makes me all happy again.

Adventure

i love change

the above obviously applies to my brand new, beautiful, background. and the cute little 'smile' button on the right. and the fact that nearly two months after my very first blog, i have filled out the 'about me' section. it's not perfect, and i'm still not sure what i'm supposed to write, but it will do for now. until i change it again. i love change in many forms, in the weather, in places to shop, in cities, in countries. keeping something the same for years on end just seems to boring. then i'd have nothing to blog about. adventurers need to adventure.

Childhood Country

i love rivers so small they barely trickle

first of all, how great is that word? trickle - it makes me go all warm and fuzzy on the inside.
anyway.

sunday afternoon, it was absolutely lovely out, so i decided to take my bike out for a while. after riding until my legs ached, i stopped at a bench i haven't sat on in years. to my left was a gorgeous little paradise which brings back so many memories of being a very small child. when i was really little, my grandmother would bring me to this exact spot. as you can see, there's a small wooden bridge; i used to dangle my tiny legs off of the edge, and jump into the small stream of water. splashing around in my wellington boots in the few inches of running water used to give me so much pleasure that only feeding the ducks could rival. a little further down from this picturesque scene is the place at which this too would take place. i even remember fearing the huge, nasty geese.

PS. i was going to save this for tomorrow, but i decided it was too lovely too keep locked away

Music

i love meaningful lyrics

friday night (after my major hunt for an outfit) i went with a few friends to a sion show. the original idea was to support the warm up acts, as two of the bands included some good friends of ours. now, bearing in mind this particular auditorium can hold around about two hundred people, only about thirty turned up. however, the show went on, and the warm up acts were beyond amazing; covering several popular songs. sion are not a very well known band, although after the performance they gave, they should be. they are one of those rare bands whose recorded songs do not do them justice. (neither does this photo, and i apologise for the rather shocking iphone camera quality)granted. their style of music won't be to everyones taste, to be honest it wasn't to mine, but that shouldn't be a factor in this review. because of their unbelievable presence on stage, each band member brings something special. the vocals are flawless and the music is just stunning, and the bassist is crazy. my personal favourite song of theirs is their brand new single 'not with experience' (filmed in our school gym - strangely enough) and if you like that, check out 'drifting away' (alternately named 'wolf parade'). they're currently touring england and with cheap tickets this is such a great way to spend a friday night. i'm going to put myself out there on this one, and say that they are bordering on being the twenty first century nirvana.

Unexpected Thought

i love warm evening breezes

just a quick one tonight, as i am supposed to be studying. earlier a lucky twitter find bought this website to my attention. secondchanceonline (if you don't check it out asap, shame on you) it is so emotional. very much like postsecret, but with more of an empowering yet terrifyingly true vibe. at the beginning of this blog, i intended to end on the statement that i feel i am too young to regret anything, and cannot think of a single thing that has been so catastrophic to which i now regret. however, a thought has just came to me. that i am merely weeks away from doing something that right now i don't want to do and could severely regret. if i follow my head, everyone's happy. except for two people. one of which, i would absolutely hate to upset and hurt. the other, is me. but if i follow my heart, i could damage two other people. and get myself into an uncomfortable situation to say the least. and yet, i really don't think i'd regret it. because i would be happier, knowing that i got to do what i want. although, i would break a promise. one which i have kept for a very long time. and i don't break promises. do i keep a promise and regret? or do i break it, and live without regrets? this is a decision i cannot make.

Demolition?

i love walking aimlessly

after school on friday, i decided to pop into town to get myself an outfit for the event occurring later on that evening. on my, rather obscenely hurried, walk home i decided to take a shortcut down a path which i haven't walked for years. along this path, there was a gorgeous little cottage, which had been swamped by industry and estates popping up all around it. not far to the right was a noisy train line, a few minutes walk to the left was a huge housing estate, and metres behind was a large industrial unit. for as long as i can remember the front of this cottage overlooked an unruly uncared for field, and the house remained empty. this particular afternoon, i stormed past at a speed rivaling light, when i suddenly noticed something. i removed my headphones and stood in shock at what i saw.
the beautiful little cottage obviously brought no value to anyone anymore. what used to be a wonderful gem, had been what i consider brutally attacked. the windows smashed, roof caved in, it had been torn to pieces. this really saddened me. what's more is that someone tried to protect this worsening by putting up a large fence. (i managed to slip my hand through the bars to snap this photo) however, it merely adds to the ugliness of the scene. and to see something i once adored gazing at on my little trips into town completely robbed of its former beauty is somewhat worse than tearing it down altogether.

Comfortable

i love walking in the rain, when it's warm out

due to the fact that i am somewhat of an insomniac at weekends, the plan i constructed yesterday, i knew wasn't going to happen when it was one o'clock in the morning and i was still on the phone. so instead i had a lovely little lie-in. just in case the picture misleads you, i was in fact on my own (aww) considering that i am still sixteen i wouldn't say being on my own was a bad thing, at all. there are times when i wouldn't mind a bit of company though, i mean, everyone gets lonely.
i have some gorgeous little pictures from my weekend which i hope to post very soon in a separate blog. hoping you all had a lovely weekend!

May Day

from now on, at the beginning of each blog, i will mention something i love.

i love sitting on my feet until they're completely numb

and then begin the blog.

due to the three day weekend, tomorrow morning i will walk into town, buy myself a book, get breakfast in a coffee shop. then walk home a satisfied girl.
i am absurdly exhausted and was planning on an early night. i also have two nasty stinging nettle stings on my little finger. so to answer the question in my previous blog, definitely a city girl.

Terribly Happy

today, it is raining. it is horrid. and i have a revision class in half an hour. so to stop myself slipping into a light depression i have decided to compile my list of things that make me terribly happy.

1. acoustic versions of my favourite songs
2. beautiful sunny mornings
3. colour; lots and lots of it
4. travelling
   
5. happy strangers
6. my little blue notebook
7. pretty polaroid pictures
8. lucky guesses
9. good hair days
10. reading books in coffee shops

now that is much much better

PS. many thanks to rockstar diaries for the inspiration for this post

Style

i'm at a very weird place right now. some events have occurred which i am not really all that willing to announce to the world right away, which have shaken me to say the least. it's left me feeling lost. and i'm not quite sure what happens next. so apologies for the non-consistent blogging you have received, or not so, as it may seem.

two and a half weeks i've been back at school, what i miss most; is the morning. i now dread the rising sun and the accompanying light breaking through my curtains to awake me. it reminds me of another day trawling through work, of which most will be of use only in my exams. i'm not sure where i'm going, but it will not be a scientist of atom energy...
at the same time, there's this overpowering pressure being applied from every angle. at a time so close to the exams every adult willing me to do well, feels that they should be vocal about this. as much as i adore your encouragement and your well-wishing, i'd rather not be reminded that the exams which will effectively determine my path of life are in just one months time.
granted. in return, an eight week break is mine to do what i like with.
first, i have to survive prom. now, as much as i love the dancing, dining and dresses; the judgement that is placed upon you the very moment you step out of whichever posh/crazy mode of transport you have taken to the venue, is unbearable. every aspect of your appearance is commented on and criticized, from your dress to your date. and it doesn't seem fair that it is the western world's way of making themselves feel valued; by bullying everyone else. i do it too, and don't get me wrong, i'm not trying to be the planets biggest hypocrite. i'm merely trying to convey disappointment to the society in which we live. and for sixteen year old's turning their noses up at one another's outfits is somewhat shameful. i see no need for it, and yet, i see no solution.
on a much lighter note, i am in love with the city. London is absolutely enchanting. how people cannot stand it, i do not know. one of my good friends pointed out that everyone is always in such a rush, walking with their heads down, ipods roaring into their ears. they need to look up. listen to the rushing traffic, the laughter, the beautiful scenes taking place in such an utterly glorious city. every time i cross the River Thames bridge i get shivers down my spine, when faced with the breathtaking view of both Westminster, the river and the London Eye. it doesn't seem real. like some sort of fantastic high definition television broadcast. the cross between classical old and the amazingly modern styles are incredible. the buildings are beautifully crafted out of raw inspiration, and talent just flows out of every theatre and onto the streets.
i long to reach out and touch the very core of this city; wander the streets, looking up.
i'm starting to question, am i a city girl at heart? or still a country girl?

PS. any thoughts on the new style? and i'm having major problems with the layout of my posts, can't seem to create any breaks between paragraphs...

Early Bird

I often meet people who seem afraid of the morning. It's as if bad things only happen to them in the morning. Listen to this. Today I got up at seven thirty am. On a Sunday. I left the house an hour later and spent the next two and a half walking. I saw my hometown in ways I have never seen it before.

• I saw the basic infrastructure of the town market being slowly set up
• I saw the indoor shopping centre's doors being unlocked
• I saw an empty railway station, and empty tracks
• I saw clear, quiet roads
• I heard waterfalls and birds
• I felt free

Today, I spent two hours in the sun, exercising and I enjoyed it. Tomorrow, I will spend six hours indoors, sat down, and I will not enjoy it. Don't be afraid of the morning, it's not all that scary.

Handbags & Gladrags

So, I live in a somewhat run-down town in the South of England. It's not the greatest of places, and I would rather shop anywhere else. However, today, I needed to go in to pick up a few things.
I kept getting strange looks, normally this wouldn't bother me, but when you catch the eye of practically every person who walks past you, you begin to get a little suspicious. Twenty minutes later, I was agitated, annoyed and ever-so-slightly upset. I could not work out what was causing all of these looks. If I had been with a friend, I could have asked what it was about my appearance that caused me to get these odd looks. My phone then rang. As I reached into my bag I noticed what the reason behind these looks was.My favourite handbag.

Plus, Daisy (my only follower so far - mentioned here) comes home from her holiday today!

Frustration

I cannot concentrate on anything. Distraction is in the air, blowing in the wind, especially when there's no wind. But, hopefully, I should stay on track with today's blog, as instead of revising (I am going to fail my GCSE's) I have been planning this.

Firstly

I have decided to let my personality 'shine through' a bit more, because it's been far too formal.

Secondly

Recently I have become a YouTube geek. I have subscribed to about six channels in the space of a week. I have watched more videos than I care to mention and am one hundred percent addicted.

Thirdly

Being a YouTube geek has made me want to vlog. I've thought of a million topics, and want to post constantly. However, my only web cam is, for lack of a better word, stupid. The Logitec software does not agree with my iTunes, causing a blue screen of death to attack my laptop at every opportunity. Therefore, I no longer have camera software = no working camera. Damnit.

Comments!

I have once again sneaked (is that even a word?) away from revision to post a little blog. This time next week I will have just finished my day at school, I am more than dreading going back. I wish this week would last forever. I have been criticised for three things blog-wise.

1. I don't proof read - it's true, I don't. I really should.
2. I chop and change between topics - there isn't much fluidity I'll admit, but, variety is the spice of life don't you think?
3. I rarely have a link between my images and my posts - please see #2
   

I know, I haven't yet got a following. However, a little message to future followers - please please please comment on my posts! Even if you don't have anything to say. The word 'bananas' will do. I will try my very hardest to get back to you, as I do read every comment that comes my way. Plus. Any questions I will be happy to answer. If you wish to get in contact with me, feel free to email me at sydneyswift93@googlemail.com . I look forward to hearing from you all. After all, there's no friends like Internet friends.

To Post is to Follow.

I always feel bad when I don't post at least once a day. I'm not really sure why, because there are very few regular blogger. Sometimes it's difficult to come up with ideas and get inspired. Although, sometimes, they just come to me. Currently, I follow five blogs.

• fashiontoast - I'm a girl, therefore, I am weak when it comes to fashion. This blog has some seriously gorgeous stuff going on.
• missdaisyb - The first person ever to comment on my blog, I've been following her ever since. She seems to have a real feel for writing and gets enjoyment out of it. It gives the blog so much energy, which I love.
• postsecret - The worldwide Internet phenomenon which is so incredibly unique. The idea of sending in your secrets anonymously, to then be published on a site, which has one of the largest twitter followings ever, is just genius.
• Le Love - I used to visit this site before I became a blogger. Random images of love put together to form a beautiful montage of ... love.
• Rockstar Diaries - My favourite blog, thank you Stumble Upon. Never have I found ordinary peoples lives more exciting. This is a real life account of a very happily married couple has left me totally devoted. I love it.

I definitely reccomend checking these out. It will not be a waste of your time, I promise.

Plus, my profile views has reached 100, yay!

Beaches

Each picture I upload I have to edit slightly for copyright purposes. Cropping this one was absolutely heart-breaking. I did manage to crop the tiniest pixel possible from the left hand side, but oh, this image. There has always been something about a beach which completely perplexes me, and yet, leaves me speechless with the greatest desire to belong within those very grains of sea soaked sand. It has always been a source of great inspiration in my writing. For years, I vowed to myself, the moment I could drive any sort of transport powered by an engine, I would visit a beach. Take a book. And read. Knowing I rely on only myself.

Pure Poetry

These past few days have been somewhat surreal, yet somewhat perfect. I tend to judge days on how hard I laugh and how happy I am at the end of it all. Yesterday, I must have spent my entire afternoon in tears; tears of laughter. Today, I met someone, and I smiled like I haven't in what feels like years. It was one of those moments where you just know. You know it's all going okay, and you know it will all turn out okay. Also; I got told something today. A month ago it would have spun me out of control and completely shattered me. Instead, I deleted your poems. And I've never felt more free.

Concerns

So, I have the most important examinations of my entire life so far in two months time. This does not concern me. The fact that my own dreaded ambition to achieve and succeed at everything I do concerns me. I am crushing my own creativity with this unwanted, forced desire to study. I want the freedom to be a teenager now, not in three, four months time. The weather is to die for (which is very rare here) and I want to enjoy it. I cycled down to this beautiful spot (above) this evening to see the sunsetting. I snapped this gorgeous image of the fields and the village in the distance. This is where I want to spend these lovely days, not behind the windows, in front of them.

Summer?

Recently the weather has been amazing. So today, I got up early to paint my toenails, oh yes, the ultimate example of summer arrival. I was going to venture into town with some yellow sandals, accessories and matching toenails. Although, my attempt was thwarted by the return of the clouds. English weather sucks.

I <3 Google

Today, I Googled my name. No, not out of utter boredom. But to see if my blog showed up. I can infact reveal that http://sydneyswift.blogspot.com/ is number 19 (thats the bottom of page #2) when the keywords 'Sydney Swift' are entered into Google! Hurrah! However, even more exiting news, is that my Plinky page, is number 2! I am now easily found through the worlds most extensive search engine :)
In other news, it is finally the Easter holidays. I am going to pair up with a chumette to make a rainbow cake ( http://www.odditycentral.com/pics/how-to-make-a-rainbow-cake.html ). Oh yes. The ultimate E number-filled, artificial, barely edible, piece of yum you ever did see.
Hopefully the sunny weather holds out, there's nothing worse than being on holiday in the rain...